I hate french people

Q: How do you brainwash a Frenchman?
A: Fill up his boots with water.

Q: What do you call a Frenchman with 1500 girlfriends?
A: A shepherd.

French people don’t wash very often. They don’t call Paris the “perfume city” for nothing.

Q: Why did the Frenchman cross the road ?
A: To surrender, of course !

Dani asked:

Hello, JFF. I have a big problem. I met this girl wich is very
beautiful and I like spending time with her. She is not french, but
she likes the french language, the french people, the french wine and
even Paris. I took a sample of her hair and went to the lab to see if
she has some french DNA, but she doesn’t.

So, she’s a french wannabe and i hate the motherfuckers. Do you think
I should go for it?

Well I’m very surprised you took a sample of her hair to a laboratory to see if she’s french … but I’m still curios what hair are you talking about. If you took a piece of hair from her head … I don’t think that’s any good, because as far as I know, a lot of women use those hair dye products (probably french hair colorants) which probably alter the DNA.

French women also use that on their armpit hair, because they don’t want the horny men on top of them too see any white hairs there. I’m not sure about the pubic region, because the french ladies do like to play with that area (some of them I bet even color their pubes in blue, white and red, like the mighty French Flag), some of the french ladies like to shape that area (eiffel tower pubes or even that arch of triumph) and some of the french ladies have whole ecosistems there. So that’s also an uncertain place for grabbing hairs for DNA testing.

So, what I’ve been trying to say is that you can’t know for sure if she’s french by just taking a hair off her. French women are sneaky, and she still might be very french. I mean I don’t really see a good reason for any non-french person to like the french, France, francais and Paris.

I think you should investigate more … find out her family tree, maybe she has french ancestors.
Or just ask her to do what any french women likes to do, and enjoy those bushy armpits.

Here are my favorite french posts until now …

From the Slimy French category -> Once upon a time
From the French jokes category I can’t select only one, but among my favorites are:
-> French joke
-> French joke
-> French joke
-> French joke
-> French joke
From the French habits category -> French stripes
From the French facts category -> French fact #23
From the French pictures category -> French toilet

Which ones are yours ?