French Archive for the 'Slimy french' Category

Why is it that we have to speak English

Tuesday, October 30th, 2007

An officer in the U.S. Naval reserve was attending a conference that included admirals from both the U.S. Navy and the French Navy. At a cocktail reception, he found himself in a small group that included personnel from both navies.
The French admiral started complaining that whereas Europeans learned many languages, Americans learned only English. He […]

French lion

Monday, September 3rd, 2007

A lion in the zoo was lying in the sun licking its rear end when a visitor turned to the zoo keeper and said : “That’s a docile old thing isn’t it ?”.
“No way”, said the zoo keeper, “it’s the most ferocious beast in the zoo. Why just an hour ago it dragged a Frenchman […]

French measures

Monday, August 27th, 2007

An American is walking down the street when he sees a Frenchman with a very long pole and a yardstick.
He’s standing the pole on its end and trying to reach the top of it with his yardstick.
Seeing the Polak’s ignorance, the American wrenches the pole out of his hand, lays it on the sidewalk, measures […]

French camel

Thursday, August 23rd, 2007

A frenchman walks into a bar, smiles at the landlord and orders a glass of wine. The frenchie looks about and sees a camel sitting at the bar as well.
The frenchie asks the landlord, What is that dirty camel doing in here?
The Landlord pulls a cricket bat out from behind the bar hits the camel […]

French brains

Thursday, August 16th, 2007

A cannibal went into the butcher shop to buy some brains for dinner.
She saw that American and British brains were $4.95 per lb and French brains were $450.00 per lb.
She gasped and asked the butcher if the price of the French brains were a misprint.
“No ma’m”, answered the butcher. “That is the correct price”.
“Well, why […]

The brave French fighter pilot

Sunday, July 29th, 2007

I actually heard this one from my wife, because she is a Frenchhater too you know …
Pierre, a brave French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine.
It’s a beautiful day and love is in the air.
Marie leans over to Pierre and says, “Pierre, kiss me!”.
Pierre […]

I especially hate the slimy french cheese-eating surrendering monkey-frogs.