I did receive all your french questions and all your french messages, and I will make sure to answer them all once the new site is online.

Until then I will take this one offline on account of the abnormal french spam I’ve been getting.
But first, what do you think about this logo:

?
I feel it’s missing something …

Yeah, the french already shit their pants.

The 40-meter-high Condomfiere will fly on every continent starting next Dec. 1, the World Day against AIDS, to promote condom use and prevention against sexually transmitted diseases.

My thoughts on the French Giant Condom:
- only the French can do such a thing
- french people are hypocrites because they never use protection, but they have a good reason because french illnesses surrender pretty fast
- the French probably stay awake at night, thinking of ways to piss off the rest of the world
- I hope they release it from the Eiffel Tower, and I hope it breaks (both the condom and ze tower).

It wasn’t as cold as I expected but I managed to have fun somehow.

So expect new content soon, after I get rid of all this french spam.

Vive la France !!! No, not really.

Let’s analyze for France’s sake french people’s nickname: cheese eating surrendering monkey-frogs.

The first part I’ll assume it’s clear … french people are cheese-eating people. They eat cheese. Cheese is eaten by them. Stinky, smelly, disgusting cheese. They like to eat cheese in different shapes, like cheese on a stick, cheese from the ground, turd-cheese, cheesy cheese, eiffel tower shaped cheese, wall cheese, moldy cheese. It is said that french people don’t really have teeth, that’s just cheese stuck in their gums.
Also french people seem to be severely affected by cheeseburgers, which contain the only type of cheese french people don’t like, which is clean, healthy, properly cooked tasty cheese, melted on a delicious piece of meat.

The second part we all know … french people surrender. If you point your finger at them and say “Bonjour”, you don’t need to tell him to surrender, it’s in his blood. But if you do want a french faggy smoke, ask him for a cigar, and he’ll probably surrender that as well, unless it’s the last one, because if it is he’ll give it to you and offer to perform oral sexual services so you’d let him smoke half.

Now it gets interesting … the monkey part.
We all know french people are hairy, especially french women. French women don’t grow hair everywhere, but they do have titanic amounts in the groin area and the armpit area, along with moustaches. As far as I know men have only moustaches.
So hair is the first thing they have in common with monkeys.

The second thing french people have in common with monkeys would be shit handling. By shit I mean feces, also known as poo, poop, number two, dookie, crap, turd, dung, scat, spoor, droppings, doody, stool or as the french call it: food.
We all know monkeys like to shit in their hands then throw the projectiles at people in the zoo or at each other (both in the zoo and in the wild). That’s almost exactly what french people do too, only they’re not shitting at the zoo, they’re doing it on the streets which might explain why Paris is covered knee-deep in shit.

The frog part is due to their frog eating habits. The french enjoy a tasty froggie in the afternoon after the morning snail, and if I think about it, they enjoy all kinds of green slimy things, from diseased tree bark to toxic radioactive rats.
But I’m not sure if you can make the connection with berets. You see, berets were invented by frogs, frogs wore berets originally before the french started to do that too.
The final common thing frogs and the french have in common is skin color … we’ve all seen the green french people.

And that’s why French people are cheese eating surrendering monkey frogs.
If this post doesn’t make sense, you’re probably French.

Merry French Christmas from your favorite Frenchhater !

Check out the Joyeux Noël post, follow me on ze French mighty Twitté and have a great time on your holiday (unless you’re French).

I wanted to write about a couple of things but they didn’t seem funny.

Got any french interesting stuff you’d like to submit ?
Or some french questions ?

Hello ?

Sure the french don’t give out candy or any kinds of sweets, they give dead frogs, onions and of course french garlic. Some of the more generous french people give out snail slime.

Of course every year among the french people getting disguised as something french-related, I see some really strange french people (even for french standards) …

French woman dressed as a french pudel. Awesome !!!

French gay burglars

Menstruating horny french lesbian werewolves

I dressed as a frenchman of course, with a fake moustache, garlic bling-bling chain around my neck, a striped shirt, the mighty french beret and lots of cigarettes.
It was a poor halloween because the french people I’ve visited didn’t understand I was wearing a costume.
Next year I’ll get a baguette costume.

Happy Halloween everyone !

You see, the French were always careful with the environment, even in the dark ages. As back then they didn’t have cigars to puff a layer of smoke like the one in Paris right now, they made their towns smell bad with other things like garlic, rotten eggs, dead french animals, onions, hairy armpits and unwashed french vaginas.

But just laying them around would make them dissapear naturally after a while, so the French got this amazing idea to put them in pots and place a layer of sea salt over them to create a layer of mold after a while, so the smell stink would be more powerful, and so they could keep the french people from eating the yummy but rotten things in the pot (french people hate salt).

Nowadays around the world potpourri is used for decorative purposes and of course to provide a nice smell around the house (if you use flowers and stuff that smells nice, nothing french). So yeah, don’t buy one.

How cool is that ? From all this content on my website, Bing chose that as the description.
Google is French. Use Bing.